Dr.Marcu Abreu Relationship Evolution Program
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Most couples believe that communication is the key to a successful relationship. But what if communication itself is the problem? Silence can be just as damaging to a relationship as words. In this post, we'll explore how silence can destroy a relationship and offer tips for overcoming this destructive force. Silence can be especially harmful when it's used to avoid conflict or mask feelings of anger, frustration, or hurt. If you're struggling with unhealthy silence in your relationship, don't hesitate to seek help from a coach, therapist, or counselor trained in relationship coaching.


When discussing the concept of silence, I'm not referring to that awkward moment in any relationship where you're beginning something new. We'll be talking more specifically about how this term applies when one person can't hear what their partner is saying because they've stopped talking out loud themselves--they need natural communication! This post will cover tips for ensuring you pay attention to sometimes very subtle signs that could indicate trouble in paradise.

Silence can be deadly to a relationship

Relationship silence. It's poison for you and your partner because usually when you've reached the point of silence - or shutting down - and just not wanting to deal with your partner in any meaningful communicative way, you're in big trouble and could be headed for a separation or worse yet divorce.

Subtle silence or politeness: You know that your relationship suffers from silence when you haven't debated with your partner about anything in the past few months. You haven't had an interesting conversation about anything important to either of you in the past few months or weeks. You have disconnected.


And either one or both of you initiated the silence to stop having to deal with judgments, criticisms, and other harmful conversation killers.

Both people try to get their voices heard when there is healthy debate or even heated arguing in a relationship. They are trying to get their points across. They are showing their partner that they are a separate and distinct person from their reality. Any way you slice it - opinions are on the table, and both of you know where the other stands. With silence, no one knows where the other stands. There is much guessing and assuming because no one feels like they are being heard. And we all know where that can lead.

The silent treatment.

It would be best if you never used silent treatment as a weapon in your relationship. If you are mad at someone because they have crossed a boundary and want to show him/her your limits by becoming silent, then that's fair game. But if this is just an excuse for you to exert control over your partner for them not capitulating to your demands, then that is toxic.

Couples should make an effort to communicate with each other even when they don't feel like talking.

What can I do about the toxic silence?


Relationship silence is simple to cure but not always easy.  The biggest hurdle is for someone to take the first step. The second is to understand why you both shut down in the first place. What was the last big argument you had? And what was said? And if the silence has gotten beyond the point of anyone taking that first leap of faith - you may need an impartial person such as a mediator, coach, or therapist to help you through it.


The longer the silence goes, the worse it can get. It can make the other person feel ignored and unimportant. It can breed resentment and misunderstanding.


Quick Tip: If you are afraid to talk to your partner because of his or her reaction, maybe - ask yourself, "what am I afraid of?" What would the worst-case scenario be if I demanded to be heard? Do I trust my partner not to judge me, criticize me, or leave me if I speak up?

Silence can be deadly in a relationship. If your partner uses silence to manipulate you, talking about what's happening is essential. Silence can also be a way of protesting or keeping boundaries. Whatever the reason for the silence, the solution is simple – talk. Subscribe now for more helpful tips to keep your relationship healthy and thriving!

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